This album is more or less a patch-work of songs and ideas that were tossed together by REPTILIAN DEATH, so instead of me typing out all the shit myself I’ll simply quote the bands biography- “The album is entitled ’Total Annihilation’. It is basically divided into the 3 stages of REPTILIAN DEATH starting as a solo project of The Demonstealer where ’5 Easy Ways To Murder Someone’ was created and recorded. In the second stage, the solo project changed from a spoofy Death Metal solo project to a proper Death Metal act. All the songs the band performed live are also on the recording. This part of the album also sees the vocal talents of Aditya of EXHUMATION featuring on the track ’Bathed In Blood’. Interestingly, The Demonstealer has done all the guitar/bass playing on the album apart from the vocals and drums even for the band songs. The third part of the album is the latest offering from REPTILIAN DEATH, not as a band anymore, but as a solo spoofy Death Metal project. ’Nursery Rhymes For Satan's Children’ is a crazy, funny but yet brutal concept. It has 5 Rhymes in total including ’Baa Baa Bloody Sheep’ and ’Jack And Jenna Jameson’. ”
I’ve figured, just like my review on ENEMY UNKNOWN’s “Alert Status: RED” that I’ll divide and score this album in parts, and then gain the total score from the average, which is only fair seeing as this is basically a 3 part album.
Part 1: Tracks 1 to 7, which from what I can tell is the actual studio part of the album laid down by the band itself. They play a fairly old-school brand of Death Metal, with nice head-banging riffs and occasional melodic tinges (“No Way To Die”, “Total Annihilation”, “Abortion”). For the most part these songs are pretty damn good, although they don’t tread any ground that hasn’t been trodden thousands of times before. 7.5/10
Part 2: Tracks 8 to 13, otherwise known as “Nursery Rhymes For Satan’s Children”. The biography describes this section of the album as a “crazy, funny but yet brutal concept”. While this part of the album may not be particularly funny or crazy, it still retains a lot of the old-school groove REPTILIAN DEATH demonstrated in the first part of the album, as well as stepping up the level of brutality. Gone are the melodic overtones and subtle Gothenburg worship. In their place have come more frequent blastbeats, and some fairly over-the-top use of voice samples from Santa Clause himself, bemoaning his non-existent sex life. The samples do get annoying after a while, but the music here is undeniably good, and would be muchly improved without the excessive samples. 8/10
Part 3: Tracks 14 to 19, otherwise known as “5 Easy Ways To Murder Someone”. This section of the album is a sad disappointment, and sounds like it was recorded using a hooker’s asshole as the microphone. Not only is the production terrible, the music sucks, and the theme is more annoying than funny. What a waste of time. 3/10
All in all, this album is pretty good, but could have done without the last 6 tracks. If you’d like to hear the bastard child of IN FLAMES, BOLT THROWER, MORBID ANGEL and SLAYER, and you like to support the underground, then check these guys out. (Online August 19, 2006)