The Metal Observer Forums

The Metal Observer Forums
It is currently Thu Jul 24, 2014 11:44 pm

All times are UTC - 7 hours




Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 31 posts ]  Go to page 1, 2, 3  Next
Author Message
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sun Apr 04, 2004 1:05 pm 
Offline
TMO Maniac
User avatar

Joined: Sun Feb 15, 2004 4:08 pm
Posts: 1257
Location: Florida, U.S.A.
50 ways to annoy a metalhead:

1. Tell them every metal band worships the devil.

2. Ask if all black metal bands are trying to copy KISS or just most of
them.

3. Hide their joint under their library card.

4. Ask if they know of any other cool bands like Slipknot.

5. If they're listening to metal, tell them it sounds like some mainstream
band. Doesn't matter who.

6. Say it's all a ripoff of Iron Butterfly anyway.

7. Ask if they've given their souls to Jesus yet.

8. Vaguely imply that you're gay and would like their company for the
evening.

9. Record over their Cannibal Corpse albums with other Cannibal Corpse
albums and see if they ever notice the difference.

10. Refuse to accept their fake I.D.

11. Ask how much Dio got paid for his role as Stuart Little.

12. Use the phrase "cookie monster vocals" and act like it's the funniest,
most original thing you've ever come up with.

13. If they're listening to metal, tell them "These guys don't have talent.
Now (insert any mainstream band here), those guys have talent!"

14. Say "What is vinyl?"

15. Point out how homosexual Manowar is. If they agree, tell them the only
thing more homosexual is Black Sabbath with Dio.

16. Tell them it all sounds the same.

17. Admit that Cliff Burton was a dirty hippy who had already peaked
musically.

18. If they say they love 80s metal, ask them what ever happened to Poison.

19. Tell them you like underground music too, like (insert the newest
overhyped fashionable loud-ish band from the radio)

20. Point out that Tarja from Nightwish can't sing.

21. Insist that Emperor videos would be better if they used a dance troupe.

22. Ask if Mayhem is Marilyn Manson's band.

23. Divert their CD shipments to the local Jewish community center.

24. Write "God Loves You" on their Venom backpatch.

25. Point out that just about every genre of music has an underground with
bands who have integrity, so metal really isn't that unique.

26. Post under their nickname on a power metal board and say Ray Alder poo
poos all over John Arch.

27. Take out the Iron Maiden disc and put in 50 Cent.

28. Give them a spiky pop-punk haircut while they sleep.

29. Pronounce "Celtic Frost" correctly.

30. If they're over 25, say that people can still rock even if they have an
unplanned child or two and drive a grocery getter. Then point and laugh.

31. Tell them you're not hiring and to try the other Cinnabon down the
street.

32. Sit quietly and applaud politely at a metal show.

33. Make them be sober for five whole seconds.

34. Ask if Randy Rhoads was on the same flight as John Denver.

35. Tell them Korn brought metal back to life in the 90s.

36. Turn the bass way up on their stereo.

37. Laugh at Slayer for stealing their name from the Buffy show.

38. Call Doro fat.

39. Call them on their horrible grammar and/or spelling.

40. Remind them that metal is partially derived from the blues. Then accuse
them of being wiggers.

41. Use the phrase "balls in a vice" at least three times when talking about
classic metal and/or power metal vocalists.

42. If it's a guy with long hair, address him as if he were female. Don't
correct yourself about it.

43. Be impressed with how much RoadRunner Records has improved over the past
ten years.

44. Say you love Metallica's debut, The Black Album.

45. Notice that Lemmy hasn't moved his left hand in 30 years of playing
bass.

46. Refer to metal as "that kill-your-father rape-your-mother stuff."

47. Ask them if their favorite band is so good, how come nobody has ever
heard of them.

48. Pine for the good old days when Pour Some Sugar On Me was a big hit.

49. Tell them you used to be a metalhead, but grew out of it when you
started listening to more intellectual stuff like (insert any band at all
here)

50. Post a list of "Ways To Annoy Metal Fans" knowing full well that so many
of them internalize


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sun Apr 04, 2004 2:19 pm 
Offline
TMO Nuts
User avatar

Joined: Fri Mar 28, 2003 1:43 pm
Posts: 3680
Location: Finland
Gret stuff :rofl:


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sun Apr 04, 2004 2:28 pm 
Offline
TMO Maniac
User avatar

Joined: Fri Aug 22, 2003 10:05 am
Posts: 1495
# 18 is good as is #43. they are my favourites. they are all funny though.

:firedevil:


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sun Apr 04, 2004 4:50 pm 
Offline
TMO Maniac
User avatar

Joined: Sun Feb 15, 2004 4:08 pm
Posts: 1257
Location: Florida, U.S.A.
#44 and #47 are damn funny to :lol:


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Mon Apr 05, 2004 3:05 am 
Offline
TMO Devil
User avatar

Joined: Sun Mar 14, 2004 4:32 am
Posts: 2421
Location: Sydney, Australia
#40 is my fave.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Mon Apr 05, 2004 1:07 pm 
Offline
TMO Maniac
User avatar

Joined: Fri May 09, 2003 7:16 am
Posts: 1394
Tjara CAN'T sing..........well technically she can but SHOULD she? no.

Numbers 9, 21, 22, 25, 29, 31, 43 and 44 were my favourites.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Mon Apr 05, 2004 6:17 pm 
Offline
TMO Reader
User avatar

Joined: Fri Sep 19, 2003 7:06 am
Posts: 335
Location: Neverland
<!--QuoteBegin-Fropeth+Apr 5 2004, 09:07 PM--></span><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td>QUOTE (Fropeth @ Apr 5 2004, 09:07 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> Tjara CAN'T sing..........well technically she can but SHOULD she? no.
[/quote]
I second that


...boy do I second that :nogood:


Top
 Profile E-mail  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Mon Apr 05, 2004 7:01 pm 
Offline
TMO Maniac
User avatar

Joined: Fri May 09, 2003 7:16 am
Posts: 1394
<!--QuoteBegin-DarkCherub+Apr 6 2004, 02:17 AM--></span><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td>QUOTE (DarkCherub @ Apr 6 2004, 02:17 AM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> <!--QuoteBegin-Fropeth+Apr 5 2004, 09:07 PM--></span><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td>QUOTE (Fropeth @ Apr 5 2004, 09:07 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> Tjara CAN'T sing..........well technically she can but SHOULD she? no.
[/quote]
I second that


...boy do I second that :nogood: [/quote]
Woooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!! Hurray for other anti-nightwishers!!!!!!!!!!!!! :beertoast:


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Apr 06, 2004 1:27 am 
Offline
TMO Regular
User avatar

Joined: Wed Feb 25, 2004 7:44 am
Posts: 988
Location: North Yorkshire, England
"I will not say anything or Mental Torme' might cut me down.

ah fuck it ....... I like nightwish (Hides behind the chair)"




I quite like 'em too so I'll hide with you!


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sun Aug 15, 2004 8:30 am 
Offline
TMO Supporter
User avatar

Joined: Sat May 15, 2004 9:05 am
Posts: 99
Location: Pompano Beach, FL
Annoying? Yes. So I guess it served it's purpose. *laughs* but funny too. Number 40 is my favorite. *laughs*


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Dec 28, 2004 4:23 pm 
Offline
TMO Reader
User avatar

Joined: Sat Nov 27, 2004 2:51 pm
Posts: 201
Location: Third star to the right. And Straight on 'til morning.
Some of that would piss me off.
:laughing1:


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sat Jan 01, 2005 4:37 pm 
Offline
TMO Devil
User avatar

Joined: Thu Aug 26, 2004 8:32 am
Posts: 2390
Location: CA
People who listen to Nonpoint annoy me!

_________________
Cig!


Top
 Profile  
 
Display posts from previous:  Sort by  
Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 31 posts ]  Go to page 1, 2, 3  Next

All times are UTC - 7 hours


Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 1 guest


You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot post attachments in this forum

Search for:
Jump to:  
cron
Powered by phpBB © 2000, 2002, 2005, 2007 phpBB Group